I lead a very healthy, active lifestyle. However, I’m pretty much always down to try any hack that promises to help me shed pounds in only a few days. After watching numerous informational YouTube videos on other people’s experiences, I decided to give The Master Cleanse a shot.
It sounds absolutely insane to even say out loud, but you don’t eat ANY food for how ever many days you do it (I did five). I suffer from really bad headaches, so I thought this would be very difficult for that reason alone, but it was actually a breeze! If you’re looking for something a little less intense, check out this post I did on my old blog on how I lost 10 pounds in a week.
A little background on the cleanse: it’s a juice fast developed by Stanley Burroughs and marketed in his 1976 book The Master Cleanse then widely popularized by Beyonce after she admitted to using the diet to slim down for her role in Dreamgirls. I don’t know about you, but if it’s good enough for Bey, it’s good enough for me.
LOTS of lemons (not bottled lemon juice)
Gallons of distilled water
Organic maple syrup
Unionized sea salt
Smooth Move Tea
Now, pause: Please, before you start this cleanse, do not go on a full out binge of fast food and stuffing your face. You will absolutely pay for it, as this will DETOX you. The day before, I ate a lot, but it was vegan and all natural. I think this helped.
Every morning, you first do a salt water flush. This consists of 1 quart lukewarm water and a teaspoon of salt. I honestly didn’t realize how much a quart is, but from the very first day, I couldn’t do this. It’s so gross. Like drinking warm broth. Hard pass! I attempted each day, but it was admittedly much less than the recipe calls for. Afterward, you start on the lemonade. You’re supposed to drink between 8-12 glasses a day. I actually did nowhere near that amount, I’m not sure if I even made it to six, but I was shockingly not starving and felt fine doing this.
Lemonade Ingredients (for one cup):
2 tbsp fresh squeezed lemon juice
2 tbsp maple syrup
8 oz. water
Pinch cayenne pepper
(It’s much more convenient to make by the gallon):
2 cups lemon juice
2 cups maple syrup
1 tsp cayenne pepper
Fill rest with water
You will be a professional lemon squeezer by the end of this, and my entire kitchen smells like lemons. At night, the last thing you have is a cup of the Smooth Move Tea. It’s a senna leaf herbal laxative – enough said. Quarantine is clearly the most appropriate time to try this diet. I actually used this one, that I got at Walmart.
The first day was much easier than expected. Did I want food? Yes. But on the bright side: I discovered a ton of amazing local restaurants that I can’t wait to try because all I did was drool over photos on food blogs and read menus. So be prepared to start seeing more food related blog posts now. Ha!
The next morning I weighed myself and was already down a whole 4 pounds! I was shocked, and that was all the motivation I needed to continue. Looking in the mirror, my stomach was already noticeably flatter. Day was easy, still no headaches, so I’m good. Did some slight ab workouts before bed. This night I realized that the tea causes me stomach cramping. It’s not bad, but it’s not pleasant either.
Weighed myself first thing and I was two pounds heavier.. how? This is why the scale is the devil. Again, even more progress on the stomach, so I’ll just roll with that. At this point I’m really wanting to hit the gym, because i miss weights and I’m afraid I’ll loss muscle mass and be looking loose, but too afraid that I’ll pass out. I skipped the tea this night.
The easiest day so far. Did a couple at home Youtube workouts – kept it pretty light, but felt effective.
My last day, I decided. Every guide I saw did it for at least seven days. I had no plans on doing that. It got me thinking how I don’t even miss food, really and I feel so normal that I could honestly do another five days. But I won’t. I did an outdoor cardio workout today. If you’ve ever spent a summer in New Orleans, then you already know how that’s going. I was fine, but after I showered, I definitely had to sit down as I got a bit lightheaded. I just drank some water and was back to normal. At this point, my stomach is FLAT – while relaxed. This is great. However, I’m being haunted by the thoughts of what happens when I start eating again.
In total, I lost seven pounds.
All in all, this diet sounds crazy.. well, it is. It basically contains none of the nutritional value your body needs so it’s not safe to do for a long period of time. However it’s good if you just want to detox or have a need to shed a few pounds *T.I. voice* expeditiously. Would I recommend? No. Lol. But I do see myself doing it again in the future – I might be crazy too though. It’s a great way to kickstart a new lifestyle change. I plan on continuing to go hard in the gym and eating right to maintain. I will be indulging in these new food places I found though. Balance.